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Tom O'Brien
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5/14/2013 5:17:34 PM
A rough of a new song
Just wrote this. I know arranging by committee is probably a terrible idea, but I'm curious to hear what you would do with this song if you were to arrange it.
Bright Girl
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Bob Elliott
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5/15/2013 11:55:05 AM
Me? I'd roll back the reverb quite a bit, roll off some of the frequencies of 300 and below on your guitar and call it a wrap.
Okay, if your really pressed me, I'd add a vibe or xylophone on the chorus with one note on the front of each measure, and that's just what I hear in my head.
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Hop On Pop
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5/15/2013 12:15:46 PM
Works really nicely as a solo/acoustic number.
But, if I were to add anything else to it at all, I would add a theremin or Moog square-wave synth sound for a little flavor. But only during the verses.
In the chorus, if you want to add anything, maybe some tambourine if you want to go popper. Or a shaker if you want to keep it more low-key.
Also, as to the EQ: you have a lot of bass on there that really starts to boom when you strum harder; tends to eat up a lot of the other frequencies. So, yeah, roll back the bass frequencies a bit. Or, even ride the EQ and roll it back just during the louder parts.
A really nice song there, Tom. I like it a lot.
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Chandra Moon
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5/16/2013 10:26:25 AM
I really like this song Tom - I could relate to it so much - you might remember me and Peter moved to the countryside for 2 years and I left Bristol to be with him. I lasted 2 years there and now we've moved back to town and both loving it.
I was so glad I gave it a try and so much gladder to get back!! I felt so isolated and although I tried to make new friends (well I did in fact) it wasn't the same.
It was very good for our relationship in the end because we only had each other for a while there and got to know each other even deeper.
The song really booms on the bass and I might add some synthy chord pads in places but I wouldn't change a lot. Oh and in my opinion there's a tad too much reverb on your vocals but overall I really like it a lot!!
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Steve Ison
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5/16/2013 2:47:02 PM
Really nice song Tom..Great lyrics (that i've totally come to expect from you)..Lovely chord changes on the verse
I like it just as a solo acoustic song like you've got-but if it were me i'd be tempted to add a bass (dum -du-dum...Dum-du-dum) n rythm to it..
An approach similar to 'Old man' by Love -or maybe how Paul Simon would if he were arranging it for simon and Garfunkel..
Long strings or held keys to emphasise the chorus too
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Stoneman
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5/17/2013 12:25:24 AM
Awesome lyrics and strumming Tom. Very memorable melody and chorus. You are such a great songwriter! I would concentrate on changing the boomy bass in the mix. One way would be to eq it out or, another way would be to re-record the guitar parts with a different setting or coloring. As others have mentioned, I would tone down the reverb. Also I would accentuate the song with some hand percussions or maybe just some finger snaps. Ultimately, you should go with your own feelings about the song. But it is cool to get some outside opinions. As usual, great work Tom!
Much Respect,
Stoneman
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Richard Scotti
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5/17/2013 8:04:36 AM
---- Updated 5/17/2013 8:06:10 AM
Tom ~ As always, your songs are heartfelt and compelling, both lyrically and musically. Your voice is also a great asset. Another highlight of your work is your excellent rhythm guitar playing. That being said, I think the biggest distraction from your presentation is the way you record your guitar. I don't know what kind of guitar you're using but even low budget guitars can sound good when recorded properly.
It sounds like you are using a Podcast type digital mic plugged directly into the computer without a preamp. I could be totally wrong in my assumptions but this is my educated guess based on what I hear. Possibly you are using a guitar pick up plugged directly into the computer or DAW. I tried all of the methods you are using when I first started recording on computer. I tried using a great acoustic (Taylor)
and a great mic. Sounded terrible! I tried the best pick up on the guitar. Still sounded shrill and tinny. It was VERY frustrating. What changed everything was using a Presonus preamp and an M-Audio MIDI interface ($100 bucks each) It was a small investment that made a big difference! You can also play synth keyboards into the interface.
I admire the fact that you are not trying to over produce and that you are keeping things simple: great vocals, lyrics and voice! The only problem is the way things are recorded. A small investment in gear would help you make a quantum leap in demo making. (Even just one of those devices I mentioned would be helpful)
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Steve April
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5/19/2013 7:21:13 PM
---- Updated 5/20/2013 9:04:19 AM
kudos to the above comments....
Well, the first verse I'm goin' "yeah beautiful..."
readin' the lyrics i got an appreciation of what/where the song's comin' from, beautiful stuff....cheers...
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