BAKE SALE

I am a general
And I’d like to offer you a cookie.
They’re really tasty cookies
I need to sell them to buy a gunship
It takes forty thousand dollars
To buy such a plane,
With no budget from the Congress
It’s driving me insane,
Without a chopper like this
We'd find flying is a strain,
So please come buy my cookies,
To help me buy a gunship ..
At the great big Army bake sale.

I am an admiral
And I need you to buy my brownies
They’re really tasty brownies
I need to sell them to buy a carrier.
It takes 5 million dollars
To buy such such a ship,
But these days the Congress
Is just giving lip,
Without a place to launch our planes,
We all will get a pink slip.
So please come buy my brownies
To help me buy a carrier …
At the great big Navy bake sale.

I am the President
And I order you to buy my Tastykakes
They’re National Security Tastykakes
I need to sell them to buy some intelligence.
The annual budget
To run the CIA
Should be doubled
Without delay
But now I find the Congress
Standing squarely in my way.
So I order you to buy my Tastykakes
So I can afford some intelligence …
At the great big Presidential bake sale.

Remember, not buying these Tastykakes will give aid and comfort to the enemy … x