Richard Scotti
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9/9/2011 10:31:59 AM
---- Updated 9/9/2011 10:33:07 AM
Thank you so much to all who have commented and to all who might ~ I really appreciate the kind words. This is a difficult time for me every year and guess it always will be. Already there is "credible threat" of a attack in NYC this week. It boggles the mind, but we have to go on. My wife and I celebrate our wedding anniversary around this time and it's always a mixed bag of emotions. One day filled with wonderful memories juxtaposed with a day of incomprehensible horror that will always be linked by the calendar for all time. Even in 2001 we still followed through with our celebratory activities which had been planned prior to the attack. We refused to let the dark take over the light but in subsequent years we are more careful at this time of year as where we go on our anniversary and how we get there. It sucks but for us it's the new normal. September will never be the same.
Also in 2001 I was a volunteer counselor in a support group for people who needed to talk about their fears and problems after the tragedy. One woman in particular was the inspiration for the song: "Tower Of Love". She was an older woman who lost her son, a fire fighter on 9/11. She cried almost continuously as she spoke.
She was very religious and had every expectation that her son would survive when they said he was missing. She felt she had a special relationship with God because she attended church on a regular basis and prayed often. She couldn't believe that God let her down and didn't answer her prayer. Her soul-crushing disillusionment,
shock, sadness and bewilderment was something that is seared into my brain.
It made me think of something my mother always said to me in times of distress:
"No matter how bad you have it, there's always some one who has it worse than you". And I always used to say back to her that it didn't ease my pain to know someone else's pain was worse. But when I heard this woman's story I knew what my mother actually meant and it made me realize that sometimes you have to rise above your pain to help heal a pain greater than your own. That's the way interpreted my mother's message in this new light. The woman received much support from me and the group. I told her I would write a song in her son's honor and although she wasn't present the next time we had the support group I did send her the song and she said she would always cherish it. The people in the group were very moved by the song as well when I played it for them at the meeting. It was the first time I saw the potential for making healing music and music that wouldn't just be an extension of ego or exaltations of romantic love but music that would reach the deepest part of other people's souls in either a serious or fun way. Listening to the song with those people was one of the most intense 4 minutes of my life! We all cried and had a group hug at the moment the song ended. (Geez, I sound like Oprah!)
No, there ain't no silver linings to 9/11 but I do try and remember how close we all felt at the time and I try to carry a spirit of optimism with me at all times. I make an effort to walk in the light and give more than I receive because the darkness is a waste of my energies and self pity is useless as well. The only effective weapon against the darkness is to shine a light and that's what I attempt to do with my music and with everything I do. Negativity can only be defeated with positivity.
This applies not just to 9/11 but to life in general. With all the natural and made made problems and all the economic woe, it's so easy to be cynical and pessimistic. Been there done that. I have to believe that things will get better because it's the only way I can forge ahead. Good thoughts and good deeds create an energy that is essential in staying out of the darkness. It's a constant struggle but it's worth it.
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