Tao Jones
|
1/15/2010 8:52:10 PM
---- Updated 1/16/2010 2:59:21 AM
Its and So
So, I have this song now that's just about seven minutes. I don't usually write long songs, but this one had words just pouring out of me. I even cut out three verses and still I'm at at seven minutes.
I'm okay with the length because somehow it's my favorite song. I listen over and over...
But on this take that I think will be the real deal I sang two words wrongly:
the real verse was:
They want to know my dreams and so
I wrote them all on cards
and instead of 'so' I sang "I have"
They want to know my dreams and I have
wrote them all on cards
No big thing, right? But I just really loved the internal rhyme of "know my dreams and so"
it just rolls right out so nicely when you sing it that way, and it really bothers me that I missed that chance.
And the other little word:
they all just stare when the dancing bear
gets down upon his knees
And I sang "its" instead of "his"
I mean, so what? Yet it bugs me to depersonalize the bear to 'it'
Now that is pretty looney tunes because there is no other line about the bear, it's just there, just came to me that way.
So I should easily get over that one, but it just bugs me 'cause it seems so much more effective as "his," and I can't even really pin point why.
These are two tiny word worries in a seven minute song just packed with words.
And I'm posting this just to say, this is what it is like when we get down there in our art, you know. It's just the way our minds tick. I wish I could change those two words but I can't.
The vocal is on the same mic and track as the acoustic, the acoustic and voice was played at the same time as the drummer laid out his beautiful drum track, and no redo I play to his track is ever gonna come close to the organic fit that is there right now. No chance.
So its
The complete words and song are here for those with seven minutes:
http://iacmusic.com/songs.aspx?SongID=79280&ArtistID=8956
|
|