Taking risks by Noah Spaceship on The Pipeline at IndieMusicPeople

Taking risks
'Nobody get's in here with their clothes on'
- that was dictated to me by the voice in my head several months ago.

..let that sink in

Who do we perceive ourselves to be and who are we really? Are they different? Are they the synonymous and synchronous? Do they jive with each other?

How often do we ask ourselves if we are able to see ourselves like others see us?

Fear - how often do we realize after facing and going through a frightening situation that it wasn't at all as bad as we thought it was going to be?

Well, this has been a challenge for me for as long as I can think back, 'what will they think?' echoes through my psyche.
I've been through tons of therapy, I was diagnosed manic bi polar with PTSD at a young age and to overcome fear of ridicule and rejection is a daily struggle and after years of simple daily exercises to unfuck my head, I function semi-normally for the most part.

What I have discovered as an artist, is my favorite creations are those that fit that scenario where I have to pass through the fear. In other words, I will come up with a song idea but it will be so outrageously different than anything mainstream, I fear I will reveal too much of my vulnerabilities and have no defense when it comes to rejection or ridicule, but I take the risk and the end result, regardless of popularity or acceptance by my peers, moves me in a way that I know I did the right thing by not adjusting to what I think 'they want to hear'.

You don't have to be attractive to everybody to be yourself, but the quality of the connections we make with our peers when we are naked and exposed are the genuine article and to me, is art in pureform.

If I could inspire people to let go of their inhibitions and find comfort in their own skin, I would, and I hope to some degree I do by creating music that is true to the source, and exposing of the soul unfiltered as well as performed boldly and with confidence.

I encourage you all to go boldly, my friends, this is our one chance to do it right and true, and we are all beautiful just the way we are.

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Two Silo Complex

1/2/2016 9:31:20 PM

Good post I try to March to my own and not really care what others think of me but I still do care sometimes and others I could give a frogg's ass. I think I have dissasotive disorder a kind of multiple personality disorder but was always to big of a coward to find out. My music is my refuge in it I feel safe. I know what I write does not appeal to some and for that matter probably most. That does not bother me but it is special when someone makes that connection and can dig it for what it is just waves waiting to be plucked from the air.
Tsc
Ken

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Father Time

1/3/2016 12:17:08 AM

Musically it takes me a lot of energy to get started on the recording process, I have all sorts of perfectionist issues about my mood and fatigue level. Don't know if it's fear though.

My income generating business I'm usually filled with dread when going from a hiatus to starting work. Then immediately after starting work I'm amazed how easy it is.

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Duane Flock

1/3/2016 7:23:45 AM

Hendrix was a manic-depressive person but you would never have known it when you saw him live!
As a kid I was made fun of, I was skinney, awkward, dorky, etc. Plus my name "Duane in the bathtub I'm dwoning" Flock (f**k) my drill sgt. had fun with that one (you're all flocked up kid). I've played music since I can remember, but when I needed an AKA I decided to call myself Oflockit. If I make it big then Great, if I don't, .....Oflockit!
So now you guys know where I got that from and what it means. A lot of my songs are like that in the sense they have special, double, or alternative insight.
Sometimes music can be used as a tool as well as personal theropy. But for the sake of art and expression it can be sooo much more. It's a fact that children that are taught music at a young age do much better professionally at their jobs and lives.

Geeeez......I've posted more this weekend then all of last year.

My two cents

D.

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1/3/2016 7:34:58 AM

Great great post, Noah.

'Nobody get's in here with their clothes on'

Very interesting.

That's the inscription on the Gates of Heaven.

~L

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Father Time

1/3/2016 8:01:48 AM

Duane, it's nice to see you around more often!

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1/3/2016 8:18:04 AM

I'd say I get more pleasure 'dressing up' in my songs - if I wrote about myself then even I would be bored. As a songwriter I can be anything and anyone I want to be, I can fantasize and create all the things I'm not in 'real life'

If I want to reach down into my true soul and pull out all the nasty stuff that lies festering then I will write a poem, I find it more freeing than trying to fit thoughts into song form.

I don't have fear as such but I have plenty of experiences I try to avoid because I've leaned from experience they end badly for me.

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Stoneman

1/3/2016 10:15:24 AM

Loved that post tremendously. I agree with everything you said there. However, one of the things I tell myself often is that nobody is going to get out of here alive. Death is lurking for me and I know it. The older I get the closer it gets. So, I am at that point that I don't give a fuck about what people think. Fuck that! I am only concerned with getting all the music that is in me out before my due date with God. He gave me the music and now I feel charged to expose it before my mission is up. I work tirelessly in the studio trying to decipher all the chords, moods, themes and compositional movements that keep me up at night. That radio in my head just keeps playing song after song and I just keep writing and producing. I know that the day the radio stops playing in my head, I will probably die. I was put here for many purposes and as long as my journey continues I will continue to display the truth that lives inside of me. I am not a creator. I am a listener/translator. My music is the language I have been given to translate. If it inspires joy, reflection, sadness, anger, love, hope, despair, spiritual awakening or anything that might bring forth an important moment for someone else, I take no credit for it. But I am sincerely grateful. Can the translator claim to have written the speech? Instead, I allow whatever accolades given to me to become inspiration to continue the work set before me. My only fear is that I will die before that last song is written, produced and released. Otherwise, I plow forward knowing that many will hate me and my music as soon as they see my face and the color of my skin. Or, as soon as they here the inflections of my voice that expose me and reveal my origin. So what? I have worn this skin for almost seven decades. The level of hatred I have faced would make most people cower in fear. But I rise each day ready to face my all White neighborhood with a smile and the knowledge that I was chosen to interpret the sounds of heaven and hell. The "N" words and Swastikas that were written on my fence are only sad reminders of the fact that they will never know me. They only see the shell of a body that I call home.

No matter what station is playing in my head at any given time, my journey continues knowing I am not the coolest, most talented or most liked person. But I can attest to being one of the hardest working people. I can attest to honesty and respect for all who respect me. I ignore the bigots. The racist bigots, the genre bigots, the musical elitists who think only they are worthy to be heard. I ignore the bullshit and go forward knowing that I was not put here to satisfy everybody. But if one person is affected or inspired by what I do, my journey and my race with time/death will have been worth it. As it says in Genesis, I say to the songs, my offspring, go forth and multiply! They have a journey of their own. Then, I boldly go back to work knowing that this could be my last song. Yet, even now today, I labor and am ready to give birth to the next 5 songs that are cued up in my little studio. I am thankful and there is no fear other than the fear of time running out. Like a good soldier, I am obsessed with completing my mission.

Time To Get Back To Work! :)

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