TNT
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8/31/2008 4:13:31 AM
Just a few sexist jokes that made me laugh today.
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men pass gas more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
Build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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Jeff Allen Myers
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8/31/2008 6:23:03 AM
Good Ones... :)
This is a good segue to Blond Jokes (I have an exemption to tell them as my wife is blonde :)
Three blondes walk into a bar and order a shot, they yell "15 days!" then slap each other on the back and drink. They order another, "15 Days!" and once again drink .
The bartender asks, "May I ask what your celebrating?" The first blonde responds.., "we put together a jigsaw puzzle in 15 days!" The bartender replies, "why is that a reason to drink?" the second Blonde answers, " On the box cover it says 4-5 years"
The bartender gives them a free round and says "That's the recommended age...."
Doh!
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