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I wonder what happened to ol Susie Trimmer?
She was abnormal. Ya got the feeling when she came into town that she might turn a corner and get eaten by a hole in the ground. What I liked about her was her mortality, she was so ultimately confused by the world and open about it on top of it all that it made me feel like I actually have my shit together and that takes a lot.

I would give her some lip, because I felt superior, wanted to put my foot down and make her stop her crazy bullshit before the rest of everybody figured out how messed up she was. Now I think about it, having not seen her around for a long time, and she was more like me than most people. It wasn't her that was off the hinges, it was me thinking that I fit in this world at all. Hell I'm a reject and no expensive makeover is gonna change that. Yea I guess I'm a bit of a masochist for even staying in Colorado City for more than a day. Back when I was willowy and chasin tail, I'd roll from one ville to another and not even care where I was. Now I feel like the guy who stands there when the snow blower shoots white powder out the chute and lets it cover me til I'm a goddamned snowman. Which reminds me about Susie, you couldn't hit her with a duplicate snowflake if you had her surrounded, she'd be over there, then over here, then she'd be in your head and you'd want to help when you really shoulda been helpin' yourself git outa that neck o' the woods.

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fly on the wall

8/13/2015 3:09:39 AM

I had a girlfriend in 2nd grade that reminds me of this Susie Trimmer you speak of. I wrote her a love poem and that led to our demise as a couple. Later on when I was a junior in high school, this girl I wouldn't normally stand a chance with made a sexual proposal when we took a walk away from the action at some party. Thinking I was clever, I refused her playing my cards for the long haul, I wanted her to have me on her brain and not just be a one night amusement though I am quite a carnival when it comes to this sort of thing. :~)

but I digress, I sent her a really great love poem and I don't think I was on her brain for one second after that.

The moral of this story is, skip the love poems and seize the fire.

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Noah Spaceship

8/13/2015 4:31:38 AM

Taiwanese exotic dancer who frequented a bar I worked at dragged me around with her for a couple of months over the summer of 98. Probably the most honest women I've ever been with. No apologies. I fondly reflect on our adventures.

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fly on the wall

6/8/2016 10:00:44 PM

There was this girl I met in middle school. I ended up with 2 other guys taking her into the woods. They meant business at the time but I didn't, I was the one who realized we were taking advantage so I stopped a bad scene that could've turned out to be a bad memory for my lifetime.

For some reason or another, after that, this girl was always around. We fooled around some but it wasn't serious. So here I was at the cast party for a play we were both in and she took my hand and walked me into the vastness of the forest. I was waay too innocent at the time to do what she had in mind (I know, hard to believe for the mover I turned out to be). I used the excuse that I respect her too much. We came back out of the forest but I strangely don't remember that part.

Little did I know at the time that this act of restraint captured her desire, she would go on to drape herself all over me in the halls of school in front of everybody while I was not really a party to what she was doing. On the last day of school I was outside saying goodbyes to people when my friend Davey beckoned me from behind the school, back where there was this hill people went in back of to make out, he said _____ wants you to come over here. I didn't go, my mind was on this other girl Lois who I was trying to woo throughout those years.

I still thought about _____ a lot, wishing other girls liked me, wanted me as much as she did. Sometimes I even thought I wish I had indulged. The story picks up a couple years ago when she showed up on the same thread on facebook where i was talking to a high school friend and yes she seemed incredibly happy to see my name. I looked at her facebook page, she's married with kids now, and was 100% certain if i had friended her and said take a plane to ______, we'll get together, it would've happened on the spot. God I wish I had brought this kind of deep fascination to other women in my life. What would that have been like? I never had an air of mystery like I did for her. The world takes me for granted. I end up with the kind of ladies who see me for my faults, not the good that I bring. Well, back to the present, time to carry on.

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