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Father Time
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10/9/2015 12:12:02 PM
my new band's new video, check it out..
we're the first ever internet garage band. :)
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Father Time
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10/10/2015 5:38:43 AM
well the lack of response here has me feeling a bit unloved. wah, as Noah might say. Anyway I would feel worse if I didn't have another video to work on right now.
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10/10/2015 6:07:00 AM
Oh Sweetheart. I'm so sorry.
Give it a bit of time. People will respond. Yesterday was John's birthday,
with a lot of creative energy in the air, so before John hijacked me to
make a new BEATLESEX record all day, I warmed up by doing like a thousand
posts on the Pipeline (being sure to have smoked my pipe beforehand,
and again right now, excuse me, be right back Blu... uh, Mr Time...)
Oh that's much better. But you wanna hear something funny?
This is the comedy that is my life. I was just in there. My bedroom/studio.
You'd think I'd have had the sense to grab the friggin' headphones.
Honestly, I can't take me anywhere. Excuse me, Take Two....
Well anyway, yes, I did a million posts yesterday...
Might have melted everyone's brain. Sorry. I can't even say 'it won't happen again'
since I didn't bank on it happening a first time.
HEY.
YEAH You.
And by YEAH You I mean EVERYBODY.
So why didn't I just say HEY EVERYBODY. Okay, point taken.
HEY EVERYBODY!!!
Stop What You're Doing And Watch Scott's Video.
There.
Okay I'm gonna go see it myself, and now I can hear it too isn't that great?
I thought so. It's the little things. I'm oddly in a terribly good mood,
because some guy named Vack in another post was admiring my rack.
Does a girl good. I'll be back...
~L
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10/10/2015 7:19:31 AM
Whoa.
Hi There.
My name is Destiny.....
(giggles like the silly girl that she is)
So this is your new band?
But you still wanted a friendlier album title than
"The Best Debut Album Ever, No Fuck YOU."
That's reasonable.
First of all, you've impressed this girl with your skill in recording;
I have never heard a more concisely done recording of a garage band.
You get to sleep with me just for the recording job.
Not that I'm easy, but I'm a professional with high quality standards. Nuff said.
Okay, I'm kidding, and I like to kid you,
and if this fact, that I like to chide and play with you has as a reality
the fact that now the Scent of the Lioness is upon you,
and in fact, no one wanted to say boo about it till they see what SHE
had to say about it...
Well She Says It's Great... Everybody Watch This Video,
Crank Up The Volume... and be suitably impressed...
I'm not only impressed, I'm undressed mentally and am seriously
contemplating running in there and shaving off this almost-beard right now.
Doesn't do much for the femininity. Although it really nails the Jesus look.
Scott you are a complex and fascinating individual.
And I do what I can believe me I do, to 'come correct' when I'm in your domain...
Oh yes, I actually listen to lyrics... best I can... you probably have
them posted as you probably have the song up somewhere I'd imagine...
The perfect woman for you might indeed be,
someone who looks like the girl in this video with the perfect legs,
ass, tits, dress and shoes...
and someone who thinks like me.
Really sucks for you, that I'm physically a fat old guy, I feel terrible about that,
and please accept my profuse apologies.
I love the song's sentiment too...
though I cannot apply it to myself...
Just my luck, if someone WERE waiting for me, I'd get there,
and they'd go "I'm sorry, I was waiting for a Girl named Oatmeal"
I'd immediately storm off in a minute and a huff, knowing full well
the inescapable fate of girls named Oatmeal.
Yes not only am I weird, just plain weird to begin with,
I also have this 'just left of Saturn' thing going on....
I suspect my mother was abducted and impregnated by Space Aliens.
It would account for all my Magic Powers.
Wha? No... you don't wanna know them.
No, I'm telling you that you do not, Sir.
Because once you know them, you cannot unknow them. Enough said?
Shhhh... Trust Mummy, you don't wanna know my Magic Powers.
And I want to tread with respect in your Magical Domain, Mr Time Wizard.
Bet you didn't know that one day you'd meet a girl who's a real Time Traveler.
Yeah. It's true. See you yesterday, only it'll be tomorrow to me.
Okay, well, let's see... in the sonic department....
I'd love to get my hands on, uh, that mix.
You have a unique voice, and you even know, ahem, how to use it. Mmmm.
I like the low-pitch growly bits. You must know that hits a woman in just
such a way, mustn't you. Yeah, I think so.
Two changes I would make, is I'd bring up the bass guitar just a bit.
Because it's good and it should be felt more...
The rule of thumb is if you're packing ten inches,
you don't just only give her six unless she specified so.
Oomph. That's right, bring the friggin' oomph, Young Patewan.
What else. Yes. That squeaky faucet. Not in your video.
In my apartment right now. ARGGGGGH!!!!! HELP!!!! GOD MAKE IT STOP!!!!!
Oh Jesus...
Unless you're the feminine form like me,
in which case:
Oh Shesus.
Is it ---oh thank God--- that hot water faucet.
It make horrible noises.
Train of thought, yoohoo, come back....
Your Voice, I should be hearing more of it.
Sure, whispered in my ear in an impromptu request
for me to wake up at four in the morning,
because suddenly Chimbala wants Friend....
But in terms of the mix,
let me guess. You mixed this.
Anyone else would have known you had to be louder.
You aren't, so you did it. See how easy the power of deduction
is when you got a pair of yummy breasts like mine?
Thank God For The Girls. I don't know what I'd do without 'em.
You might consider, or you might not,
if you're like me, at all, you won't... because usually it's rare for me
to go back and remix something once I've put it out there....
But I would myself love not only to hear you growling in my ear
in a coital demand at four in the morning, but a remix of
this record where your voice, is substantially louder.
Now let me give you basic relative elements to this.
The bass, should, be noticeably louder,
you can hear it now, yes, but you don't feel it enough.
And that's my contention, the bass needs to be felt...
It's just a matter of turning a knob and pushing in the extra inches
till she knows who you are.
I'm sorry. Right this moment people are chatting outside
my window, and it's made me terribly terribly annoyed.
I cannot even think. It's more of a goddamned distraction than this fucking beard.
Wonderful. Love has bloomed. A man and woman meet. Exchange names.
NOW GO GET A FUCKING ROOOOMMMMM!!!!!!
Shesus.
What must this post look like.
Yeah me with a bee in my bonnet so to speak.
Okay, well if you get past being self conscious of your voice
for the sole reason that it's your voice,
and bring up that voice, even more than the bass needs to be brought up,
in the mix, this will sound as it should.
There. Mother of all Destiny has spoken.
That said, this beard is doing to me what a beard usually does,
makes me feel like an absolutely hideous freak,
and then I begin to wonder why I have to be the butt of some sort
of cosmic universal joke, to a girl named Oatmeal, never to be loved.
Okay I'm a girl named Lesley in a body that forget about it,
would be real nice if I looked like the girl in this video...
I found myself wishing that about twelve hundred times
in the few seconds she's on... but I don't.
So basically but for my unfathomable musical genius,
a factor which I acknowledge the world needs desperately,
I'm a freak who probably would rather not exist at all,
but I've been that route, and God sent me back.
So God's a fucking sadist as well.
I may as well be named Oatmeal.
Nice video. Nice song. Nice voice. Fix the mix. Bye.
~L
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10/10/2015 7:25:49 AM
God, and this is me in a technically male body albeit with fantastic boobs?
Well... I wanted to say something else...
Now I can't remember it.
Yes. That's it.
I seem to recall in this video----she said trying to return to some semblance
of calm if that's at all possible---that at one point, it looked like live footage
of the back of the bassist and mostly the drummer.... that looked
to be live footage, actually taken while the song was recorded....
...yes, and my question would then be, why is there no footage
of you singing in it?
What, you foresaw me getting too hot and proceeding
to diddle myself with a banana?
God. What is this? I'm like an estrogen explosion this morning...
What gives, Self?
Is this an overcompensation of femininity gone amok,
which is taking place because I'm a girl stupid enough to try
and grow a beard and see how it goes?
I already know how it goes.
Jesus is in the mirror.
And I'm a girl named Oatmeal.
That no one loves and no one will ever love.
And then Jesus is in the mirror.
What. I'm calm. I'm terribly calm.
I'll go be calm elsewhere now.
Shhhh.
That time of the month.
~L
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10/10/2015 7:29:43 AM
HEY SERIOUSLY, EVERYBODY....
Take a moment, for me, okay?
Take a moment, or for him, it's the least you could do,
he's given you this Wonderful Magic Indie Playground to romp in...
Take a moment, and check out this very cool video,
which I wish had just a bit more of Scott in it, you can still hear him though,
he must be a bit shy when he's not being a growling cave dweller.
It's A Cool Video...
(come to think of it, I'm starting to wonder if you've not seen all my
eight hundred videos, because one of them at least, maybe more,
has some of this same psychedelic stuff in it, just like yours has.
or maybe it's a coincidence and a further shove towards Destiny,
who was named Oatmeal but she changed it for obvious reasons)
Watch His Video.
Give Mr Time The Time Of Day for the love of Fuck, Would you All, Please?
I said Please.
~L
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Father Time
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10/10/2015 7:46:02 AM
Well Lesley!
First off I want to say thanks for checking it out. I think most of the pipeliners here either hate my music or hate me or are scared of me or I'm not sure what, maybe they just weren't around (why do I go to that answer last?) Either way thanks for your elaborate comments and I'm glad you liked the song.
To answer your questions, our producer/mixer is Dave the drummer and I'm real happy with the job he did, wait til you hear the next couple songs, on some he made my voice sound great in a normal sense which to me is no easy feat.
It pleased me that you were positive about my singing, let me show you some of the comments I got in the last 2 days about it..
"methink you should let someone else handle the singing."
There's exactly zero chance that's gonna happen. heh
Check this comment out, if I didn't have such extreme belief in myself this might get me down..
"meh!
i had visit to the dentist that were less painful. lol
the song is pretty good.
the singing though..."
--------------
As for the "live footage", no that wasn't any of us, just a clip I found.
Anyway you don't need to grovel for me, I do pretty well at that on my own. haha
Let me say something confident though. I seriously believe that if people listen to the 6 songs by Negative Tendencies which will come to pass in the next month or so, and they love rock, and they're open minded, they may come face to face with a phenomenon.
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10/10/2015 9:35:15 AM
Groveling? You do well enough on your own.
You mean... you grovel to yourself? Really? No, stop fuckin' with me.
Really? What does that even look like? Do you knell before
a mirror and say
"Oh Self, Forgive me this day for not being MEEE enough!!"
and then lash yourself fifty times with licorice whip, then
eat the licorice whip off the floor immediately before you?
I wasn't groveling, I was shamelessly flirting as usual.
And okay I admitted pretty straightforwardly that I found a sexy element
to your voice, which is when you do that low pitched growly stuff,
hits a woman a certain way, and I suppose this proves I am more
of one than possibly I even want to be. And tough noogies on me.
Well, okay so the drummer mixed it.
And he's got an inferiority complex for you, as well as himself.
Well I didn't say this, but really, the drums aren't loud enough ever.
Now the problem with me, is I'll try to really 'get' the whole picture,
and the whole picture here is this IS quite a good record,
and to me, to me mind you, it's an absolute howling honking sin
not to hear the proper mix of this, because it needs a bit of sckotch up
on the drums and bass, and an honest good couple clicks up on the vocal.
Also, were I in the band, I know I'm not and thank God for that
on your own time, but were I in the band, just so I've let you know,
there'd be some sort of backup vocal in this.
I say this because involuntarily I found myself wanting to sing along.
Didn't even decide on what.
The thing about your voice,
look, I've pretty much lost that by now, and I know what it is,
so I can readily identify it for you, so you can tag the little beastie
and have it up on the iRadar screen when it's in your vicinity.
A sense of uncertainty.
I've learned to sing with certainty.
This is for a number of reasons, stemming from because I'm a musical genius.
And basically, it's 'cause I've realized that singing if done right,
is another form of talking. You'd be surprised, how many singers miss that fact.
Look, if Bob Dylan didn't prove once and for all to us all,
that ANYBODY is Allowed To Sing, if they fucking feel like it...
Well I just don't know what to say.
Jimi Hendrix would have never dared an attempt at singing once if
not for Dylan, or so he suggested when they questioned HIS voice...
"you've heard Dylan? If he can do it, I don't wanna hear about it"
...something to that effect....
You need some boost in the mindset department,
and as I am all sorts of things, Mother of all Destiny, The Muse,
yes, Proper. The very. It's me. I suppose you're going to tell me
that you didn't know that either.
Well here's your mindset Midnight Growler:
This is the Voice Of Time. No Fuck YOU.
How's THAT for a mindset.
Baby Cakes does NOT send you out without having made you a good lunch
for later, around now, when you need a good lunch with you. There you are.
Groveling he says.
If I were on my knees naked before you preparing to engage
in some sort of act that rhymes with Horatio,
I would still, not be groveling.
I'd just be loving it.
There.
She drops the mike, she walks away, saying 'your turn, Lennon'.
~L
x
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10/10/2015 9:45:29 AM
Good Morning. This is John Lennon new improved, now older than dirt, speaking.
Next year I get to sing 76 Trombones In The Big Parade.
This year, well I wanted to go to the Fields but Apple Pan Betty over here
("APPLE PAN BETTY??")
said no, on account of various reasons, none of which I agreed with,
but she's the bloody boss so I said 'well let's make a record then'.
So we did. Came out pretty damned good I thought.
I know what she's talkin' about with the own yer voice thing.
I've had me own issues with me voice. Yeah, I know, a lot of people
can't fucking believe that. And she's right, at the heart of it,
is accept what you fucking sound like, and go on and do it all you want.
Because nothing sounds better.
The actual thing, you get it? All the actual thing has to do to go ahead
and be the actual thing is don't have a problem with being the actual thing...
....just fucking be the goddamned actual thing. Why is that so hard to understand?
Well I'm the actual thing, Poor old Dead John Lennon, aged 75 holy shit,
and I'm here actually taking the time to encourage you, Young FT,
Tick Tock Boldly; Brazenly. As if Lesley Jane were your own rock n roll Mum.
Because then you'd be a fuckin' loudmouth whether you liked it or not.
Okay, so here's our record...
we just put it out....
it's called, what's it called?
"It's All Overtime" by BEATLESEX
Still can't work out how to make it a link,
but it's out here at IMP.
Well and Lesley's right, it's Official now said John
("don't you take my place on the Marquee, John")
Heaven Forbid, for fuck's sake, Love.
I'm just saying, when we put this song out,
even I was happy to see a Genre Ready And Waiting For Us:
"Beatles Rock"
Why yes. We do. And thank you wholeheartedly for noticing.
It's the little things.
You really are the Coolest Indie Site Ever, Period, Ever, Oh God
Isn't Father Time Dreamy... LESLEY! What'd you fuckin' write on this
goddamned fucking Cue Card!!!!
~John Lennon
O~O
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10/10/2015 10:01:32 AM
PS...
John here still.
First, yeah, great site, can't think of one better because
for indie music and it's whole community, no, this is it.
All that gushy stuff though, fuckin' hell. That's her. That's not me.
Oh I like you alright but you know... she's a dippy fuckin' dame and I'm not.
What. Don't jump Feminista on me, Ladies... she'll admit it herself for fuck's sake.
"he's right, yeah that'd be me.... I think I'm love starved..."
alright dammit that's enough.
I wanted to fucking talk, do you mind, Lesley?
"don't yell at me like this in front of them or I'll get you Lennon"
Fuck. Okay I'm sorry. No, you don't wanna piss about with that shit.
Trust me any and all concerned.
Anyway, it's about,
well you mentioned Phenomenon.
Something I know something about.
Advice there is along the same lines as what she said about singing.
Own it. That and beat 'em over the fucking head with it.
That's your biggest misconception that I can see;
this bit about 'if people look closely enough... they'll see a phenomenon...'
Brother,
Now I've got fuckin' Linus in me head----yeah, PEANUTS, you got it----
and he's saying
"Now if we sit here very quietly, we'll see a phenomenon,
for The Great Pumpkin Will Rise From This Very Patch
Bringing Gifts To Us All For Believing In Him".
Look,
I'd have said Nothing. Had you not uttered that word. Phenomenon.
I'm the guy who said to the boys we're gonna be bigger than Elvis.
And then we fucking were.
Got into trouble later for saying we're bigger than Jesus,
but it all worked out, now Shesus (as we now know) is in the bloody band.
And look, your name.
Your name is beyond find a good name that could be a household name.
Must be a lot of households out there looking for names.
"Oh my, whatever shall we name our household?"
"What we can afford, just like everybody else."
You found a good name. That isn't the problem.
The problem is you did come up with actually a Phenomenally Good Name.
I'm John Goddamn Lennon and I'm telling you you did.
I'd be wary of standing there with a name like that. I'd KNOW I have to be good.
Damned good.
And then I'd make sure of it.
So that I sang loud enough, and we mixed it loud enough.
You get me point, Brother?
Can't be shy about it.
Have to beat 'em over the fuckin' head with it, this is me telling you this alright?
"BOOM" Yeah, That's Us. Now You Get It.
O~O
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Father Time
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10/10/2015 11:14:21 AM
Lesley you misunderstand, the grovelling I was talking about is you telling everyone to watch my video.
As for the mixing, you send a mixed message because the first thing you said about the song was about how great the production was, that's when you thought I did it. :)
As for you, Lennon, I've always wanted to be in a band with you, Cobain and Neil Young, and Keith Moon as the drummer. Now that would be fun.
Anybody else want to chime in on the song?
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the perfect banana
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10/10/2015 11:54:07 AM
American Lesley Jane..
Don't you dare diddle yourself with a banana. That's known as abuse in our neck of the woods.
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10/10/2015 2:35:19 PM
Hmmm.
Okay.
First, to Banana....
Actually I have a rubber banana so your people are safe.
Now.
To Mr Time....
And still you call that Groveling?
Hmmmmmmmm....
Suppose technically it is, now that I access the mental records
of groveling.... arguably anyway...
but no...
it was more a Hollywood Movie Moment I was imagining...
you know she says,
"You all listen to his song by golly!"
And they all just do it, 'cause I'm American Hot Apple Pie and asked 'em to.
Okay John's around,
do listen to the BEATLESEX record we did yesterday
and put out this morning, I swear, these boys get
betterer and betterer and I'm worth me pay as well.
It's okay Banana, breathe in, breathe out... it's gonna be alright.
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10/10/2015 2:48:00 PM
Colbain, really. Is he that damned good and I just fucking didn't notice yet?
Colbain? Cobain, that's it. The Nirvana guy who posed blowing his head
off with a shotgun, then blew his head off with a shotgun.
Did he really think that was what his fans wanted?
Does he ever regret his decision, I wonder...
Okay, see, I have a problem straightaway with that one,
because of how many times they compared him to me.
Though they did that a bit with Liam Gallagher or he did anyway.
Cobain had a gift for dissonance. And he'd stand there and own it.
That I can respect. That's right, there it is, I like that it
makes your ear think something's wrong. Fuck you.
So there's that...
but there's only so many times you can record Cold Turkey.
Even give 'em back your goddamned fucking MBE,
that shit ain't goin' no higher in the charts, your lucky it got that high.
That said, I'm open to the group so far with you Time, Keith,
Neil Young if he's in the mood but you never know with him...
Well we can let Curt come to the auditions or something,
but I make no promises about him, I'm already the group weird person.
Well you didn't say anything about Lesley being in it, that leaves me.
I realize there's a lot of Cobain fans out there, can't say for the life
of me I understand all that, they were big, I remember at the time
I didn't think much of them, I can't say I think much more of them now.
I know Paul played with 'em once. He played with Kanye West too.
Lesley played with Pete Seeger, I more envy her.
Look, she got flustered 'cause you got flustered
(me thinks you two have issues to sort out)
because she mentioned mix tweaking...
It's quite a good record, far as what you got there,
I'd be remixing the thing too if I got me hands on it,
because it sounds better than it sounds, and I can hear that,
but you can't, yet,
you fuckin' would if I went and mixed it.
No. You wouldn't. You'd hate it.
We'd have to play it for about thirty seven people,
hear them all say 'Yeah that's way better'
and THEN you'd decide you like it.
I already know who I'm working with.
I'm John, the level-headed one.
"I'm level-headed" said George.
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Noah Spaceship
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10/10/2015 2:57:10 PM
Well, I love you Scott.
I love your lyrics (most of the time)
But the song and the sound isn't my style.
I like dreamy unarticulated obscured vocals without a clear message that allows the imagination to be stirred.
I like a sonic soundscape that is wishy washy and layered with tones and textures that are unidentifiable.
you have a very up in your face bold production catered for a different listening beast than I.
I wish you much success, however.
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10/10/2015 3:06:22 PM
No really, a better mix, you'd like it, Noah.
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10/10/2015 3:07:42 PM
Okay maybe some trippy backup vocals, I WAS thinking that to begin with.
I don't know that I'd have Cobain in the group either though.
Or was that even this post? Start to get 'em mixed up.
No, I was already mixed up. Gotta go.
Kitchen Wench stuff to do..
~L
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Noah Spaceship
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10/10/2015 4:53:07 PM
Fuck Kurt Cobain.
People say Radiohead is overrated.
To each their own. But that dude seemed like a complete wreck to work with.
Absolutely no professionalism, tortured and emotionally unstable.
Neil young, though, that dude is a machine. And he is consistently himself.
Keith moon was another hunk of shit ego tripped douche bag too big for his own britches. Cobain at least was sincere.
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Noah Spaceship
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10/10/2015 4:54:13 PM
And while we are on the subject, fuck the Rolling Stones while we are at it.
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Bryon Tosoff
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10/10/2015 5:06:39 PM
it is what ever turns your crankshaft. if it hits you, and if everytime you me others listen to it and if it gets better,and one connects to it, then that is cool. then there is something magical going on. just let it do its thing, let it go to the world, if it crawls out of here and does well. then cool. good luck
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negative tendencies
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10/10/2015 6:16:27 PM
---- Updated 10/10/2015 6:17:56 PM
Kurt wasn't suicidal. Courtney had him killed.
http://cobaincase.com
hmm Noah, I know the kind of music you like but I didn't think you were limited to that. Anyway I don't mind at all if people snub this traeshy song. It's meant to be played loud on the 8 track tape deck in your car.
You'll probably like the next one though, that sort of fits your description kind of.
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Stoneman
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10/10/2015 6:21:22 PM
Nice video and really good instrumentation! Rock On!
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Noah Spaceship
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10/10/2015 10:45:38 PM
Courtney and management probably and likely did have him murdered. He refused to play lolapalooza and millions were on the line.
It's highly likely they wacked him but he was still a wreck.
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Noah Spaceship
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10/10/2015 10:49:34 PM
...I don't think I'm limited to that type. I'm just not going to do cartwheels over something that doesn't connect with me.
I respect what you do and your effort. Heart and soul of rock.
Lifeblood. I commend you.
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Raandy
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10/11/2015 12:16:48 AM
The Stones are only the 3rd greatest act of all time.
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Noah Spaceship
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10/12/2015 1:55:27 AM
I kind of regret being so blunt.
I always think of FT releases as an event and I am totally a fan of yours in many levels not limited to music reasons.
Please accept my gratitude for you being you and doing all the epic shit you do for indie land.
You are the pied piper, bro.
Much love
Fu
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Father Time
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10/12/2015 3:35:38 AM
FU
Always feel free to let er rip. I might get annoyed sometimes if people don't listen at all but I don't mind at all if you don't like a song, don't expect everyone to. Besides I feel my songs have a time-released factor, what you don't like now you might like in 3 or 10 years. :)
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